The Office quotes
Michael: People I respect, heroes of mine, would be Bob Hope... Abraham Lincoln, definitely. Bono. And probably God would be the fourth one. And I just think all those people really helped the world in so many ways that it's really beyond words. It's really incalculable.
[To the camera, about the downsizing]
Michael: No, I'm not going to tell them. I don't see the point of that. As a doctor, you would not tell a patient if they had cancer.
Michael: We're like Friends. I am Chandler, and Joey, and uh, Pam is Rachel, and Dwight is...Kramer.
Michael: I do think I'm very approachable as one of the guys, but maybe I need to be even more approachabler.
Packer: Why don't witches wear panties? Because they need to grip the broom.
Erin: Holly is ruining Michael's life. He thinks she's so special, and she's so not. Her personality is, like, a 3. Her sense of humor is a 2. Her ears are, like, a 7 and a 4. Add it all up, and what do you get? 16. And he treats her like she's a perfect 40. It's nuts!
Holly: Why is it such a certainty that we're supposed to be together?
Michael: Why does the sun rise in the morning? Why do magnets stick together? Because everybody says so.